"November 14" was a turning point for me during the "Out of Darkness" project. A mellow, relaxing kind of song, it came at the point where I chose to start becoming okay with my changed life of pain and chronic fatigue. It reflects a sense of acceptance of the problem I simply could not solve or recover from, though I had tried and sought medical help for three years.
From the time of this song, the music on the project took on a more positive and mostly upbeat tone of faith and hope. Then interestingly, as I later neared the conclusion of the project, something changed inside me. I began feeling trapped by being dependent on medications and I eventually decided to stop taking them. My doctor helped me with a plan to taper off the meds, and so I began my physical journey out of darkness, which I believe had actually begun spiritually and psychologically during the recording project. Today, I take no pain medications and the chronic fatigue, pain and depression are gone.
I believe that emotion and self-expression both play a much larger role in our health than many realize. For me, music is the medium God gave me to explore and express areas of my life where I may not ordinarily reflect. Since the healing began in me, music is still playing a major part of my ongoing trajectory of recovery and hope.
For those trapped in pain, chronic fatigue, or the many other life-hindering afflictions we humans deal with, don't give up hope. Bring your pain to God, seek help, do your research, take whatever steps you need to, and let music help you explore and express your inner person. I hope you choose to process and celebrate life through music!
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